Everyone creates coping strategies or rules for living. But what happens when an extended family gathers for Christmas and each member follows those rules, rigidly? In this theatrically playful, dark comedy, the instructions are there for everyone to see – so there’s really no place to hide.

Trigger warnings: Strong language and adult themes. References to mental and physical illness.

Expressions of interest and requests for information, including access to scripts to read - please contact Robert Gregory.

Roles:

• Matthew - mid 30s, male, Son of Edith and Francis. Boyfriend of Carrie. Solicitor. Needs to be able to sing confidently without accompaniment (one instance of singing, but it is key to the plot and the character).
• Carrie - early 30s, female, Actor. Girlfriend of Matthew. Attention-seeking, sexually confident and dresses provocatively. Anxious to please and be liked. Her body language and tendency to physically move about a lot are expressive of her inner emotions.
• Sheena - early 40s, female, Married to Adam. Mother of Emma. Clearly the emotionally stronger one in the marriage. More ‘grounded’ and confident than Carrie.
• Adam - early 40s, male, Son of Edith and Francis. Married to Sheena. Father of Emma. Solicitor. Needs to be able to convincingly affect a variety of comical accents and silly voices. Tendency to sarcasm.
• Edith - 60s, female, Married to Francis. Mother to Matthew and Adam. She has a bad back which must be evident in playing the role. Concerned about appearances. Idealises her sons.
• Francis - 70s, male, Married to Edith and father to Matthew and Adam. Confined to wheelchair. Requires convincing portrayal of neurological impairment affecting his posture and speech.
• Emma - 14, female, Daughter of Adam and Sheena. Appears in one scene, but the character is crucial to the plot. Suffers from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) and depression. It should be noted that this character uses one instance of strong language in the script.

Pratchett’s back! After the sell-out success of previous Pratchett adaptations, we are delighted to be mounting another of the brilliant Discworld adaptations in the Studio.

Staging will be traverse again, as per ‘Lord and Ladies’ (if you saw that), fast paced and very character based. Below is the ideal size cast, with doubling and playing ages.

If you are interested, please come along. Any questions, contact Gary Andrews

Roles:

• Narrator
  Tooth Fairy
  - Old, female
• Susan - 20s, female, Death's Daughter
• Auditor 3 - Robed figure
  Crumley - Shop owner
  - female
• Mrs Gaiter - Posh lady
  Chickenwire - Criminal
  - 30+, female
• LC Humperding - Vampire watchperson
  Charlie
  Violet - A tooth fairy
  - 20s, female
• Sideney - 20+, any gender, Wizard in disguise, playing non-binary/male presenting
• Sir Geoffrey - Posh man
  Bilious - God of hangovers
  - 40+, male
• Auditor 1 - Robed figure
  Ridcully - Wizard
  - 40+, male
• Auditor 2 - Robed figure
  Stibbons - Wizard
  - 30+, male
• Medium Dave - 25+, male, Criminal
• Banjo - 20+, male, Large criminal
• Cpl Nobbs - Watchman
  Drumknott - Wizard
  Tooth Fairy Guard
  - 30+, male, Short
• Lord Downey - Chairman of Assassins Guild
  DEATH - Tall, deep voice
  - 40+, male
• Teatime - 25+, an assassin
• Twyla - female, Young girl, possibly played by an adult doubling with another role.
• Gawain - male, Young boy, possibly played by an adult doubling with another role.